Let’s say you have been bitten by the antiquing bug, but the rest of your family is unsure about your hobby. Here is some advice about turning that time into a shared family activity. While the photos and some of the items are geared towards shrine sales here in Japan, the tips would hold true for antique shopping anywhere else in the world as well. Realistically, flea markets and large group shops filled with mid-low level antiques are the right places for kids, not pricey provenanced antique stores. But hey, everyone has to start somewhere!
Here is my basic advice on antiquing with kids. Please feel free to send me comments and ideas that work for you!
1. Give each child a small but reasonable sum of money to spend, whether it be their allowance or money specifically for that day. Set guidelines (no candy, for instance) or have them create a shopping list in advance (small animals to add to their doll house scene, for instance). Then try to let go of controlling their purchases. The key here is that they need to be truly interested and feel like they are in charge of what they buy.
2. Like adults, kids are interested in what they know. Over time, help each child to start a collection and help them to become educated about what they like. Get reference materials at their reading level or go to museum exhibits when possible.
3. Use imagination to speculate about what and how things were used in the past, their meanings, their histories and discover new uses for them. Talk about an item’s cultural significance.
4. Have kids shop for gifts. If you love to hunt for antiques and collectibles, then they can always look for gifts for you. Gifts for friends are always fun, especially mementos of time abroad for those of us who are expats. A unique and authentic sayonara (good-bye) present for a friend who is moving is a perfect thing to find at a shrine sale.
5. Add in the life and math lessons. Make kids inquire about prices, test their courage by bargaining and calculate change.
6. Manners, manners, manners. While the requisite bow in addition to the thank you is for those in Japan only, completing a transaction with grace and gratitude is important anywhere. And being respectful of breakables – ask before touching – is crucial.
Now I know there are those of you out there who are reading this saying “You went antiquing with GIRLS – that is easy”. To pre-empt those comments, I decided to test drive a shrine sale with two boys, aged 9 and 11, the sons of my college roommate who is visiting this week. We traveled to Takahata Fudo, a big Buddhist temple in the western suburbs of Tokyo. In addition to the shrine sale held on the 3rd Sunday of the month, Takahata Fudo boasts a 5 story pagoda, an excellent yakisoba (fried noodles) seller and an active schedule of events.
The boys were lukewarm but willing as we set out. My girls dove in, knowing what to expect, while the boys cased the scene slowly. A sure-fire hit? There are always dealers selling war mementos or weapons or tools of some sort, sure to engage any boy’s interest. Machete anyone?
Everyone was interested in vintage coins. Collecting stamps and coins feels like it has gone out of style, so I think that means it is ready for a come-back. There is no “funner” way to learn about geography!
Postcards, old photos and other ephemera are one of the cheapest and most varied of all collectibles.
We made up stories about these folks…Note the connection with the girl doing nihon buyo (Japanese traditional dance) in the black and white photo here, and the purchase of a fan up above.
The first vintage thing I ever collected were these alphabet “language of flowers” postcards from the turn of the century. I still love them and they hang in my daughter’s room now. Ask my elder daughter what gift she’d love to find for me most and she’ll tell you “a letter my mom doesn’t have”. I often find her procrastinating on her homework, trolling eBay for them. Nothing makes me prouder!
Old toys, geodes and rocks, marbles, buttons, the list of what interests a child is endless and the most fascinating tend to be tiny and cheap, perfect for their budget and your decorating scheme. Remember, a little bit of tat is always a good thing!
Just be sure to avoid the life-sized Godzilla at all costs. Perhaps a size rule is in order before heading out! (I was avoiding it so much that I forgot to take a photo!)
How do I know I triumphed? Nobody was anxious to leave, everyone spent their money with great joy, and the younger boy asked if “this fair was on all week,” hoping to return. And the moms got some goodies too!
While tips on shopping for antiques with kids was easy, shopping for antiques with husbands will have to be a later post…
Vanessa
I took my 3 kids to an antique shop yesterday, a nice one. Will, 5, fell in love with the Star Wars memorabilia in a glass case…but, I am sure the elderly women managing the store were happy after we made our purchase and left! While we were there, someone knocked something over, but thankfully it was another shopper, not my children. So, you’re advice is good advice!
Tokyo Jinja
Is that where you got that gorgeous Moroccan light fixture you just emailed me? Fantastic! Where is it going?
lisa jardine
i love reading your posts and this one particularly struck me as i never think to bring my kids with me to shrine sales. looking forward to the next opportunity.
Tokyo Jinja
I’d imagine your kids would love it!
Tokyo Jinja
Lots of great sales soming up! I’d love to hear what they buy….
Dalia
This is a great post – can I go shopping with you, too?! Wonderful ideas for incorporating the kids. Thank you.
Tokyo Jinja
Thanks Dalia!
Sandy
Having experienced a shrine sale with you and your older daughter, I can attest to your methods. So enjoyable, and I remember being in awe that she was truly interested rather than just trying to please you. A+!
Tokyo Jinja
Thanks sweetie! Gotta start ’em young!
Kit
Wonderful article, full of great advice! My son, back when he would go with me anywhere, ran off and bought a pipe and a tiny globe of the world, both early Meiji. What surprises, and actually I think his purchases were more astute than mine! So, I too can attest that you’re right, boys will love the jaunt. Had a laugh at the size limitation–smart!
Tokyo Jinja
I would expect any child of yours to be good at sniffing things out!!!
Margaret Lambert
I can personally verify that your method works, as my mother used it with me and I used it with my children. We each still have small treasures we purchased as children, and some great memories and fun stories of our expeditions to all sorts of markets and sales.
Tokyo Jinja
Thanks Margaret!
Angela
a lovely post. Just to say that I visited the shrine sale on the same day and actually picked up the boxed wood carving that one of your daughters is holding in the picture, it was so cute.
I took my 15 year old daughter with me to Oedo Antique Market last Sunday, that is, my second visit of the day! On my first visit, I successfully picked up a lovely mini bamboo clothes airer(?) some more small un-netted fishing globes (9), a beautiful glass rice cracker container which I had seen there a couple of weeks earlier at a more expensive price (although I did manage to get him down another 1500 yen) and a couple of really cute small green bottles. Just before leaving I saw a beautiful ranma, but wasn’t sure about it, but on my way home on the subway I couldn’t stop thinking about it, so I grabbed some lunch at home (but couldn’t eat it out of excitement) and that’s when I went back with my daughter. We arrived just as they were packing up. The trader had 3 panels each measuring 177 cm long! They each have a deep black frame and the carving is gold depicting some bird or other, or maybe its a phoenix, I can’t tell! I have never seen anything like them. I eventually chose one which will hang in our hallway (I have been looking for a good while for something to hang there). Again I got a great price from him after a little gentle negotiating and a good amount of humour, he was a very nice guy, my daughter enjoyed this part very much. The ranma will arrive next weekend and a little gentle cleaning and maintenance will be require, but what do you expect from something that is between 125 and 150 years old! Oh he told me that they came from some temple in Yamagata, how cool is that?
So, all in all a very good day antiquing and yes you would be right in thinking that I am well and truly bitten by the antiquing bug!
Tokyo Jinja
Great story!!
style court
Brilliantly original post! I think your tips for keeping kids engaged and resisting the impulse to control their purchases is spot on. Thanks for sharing this.
Courtney
Tokyo Jinja
Starting them young is the way to go! Thanks for your comment!